If you consider yourself an Ascension Lightworker—someone who knows it’s their spiritual purpose to assist humanity and the earth through the Ascension process during these times—you may be feeling especially challenged lately.
Sure, you’re probably used to the shifts and losses that have been occurring in your life, especially since December of 2012. But perhaps in the last few months, you have felt pushed to the wall at times with all that is happening.
The new frequencies that are now streaming onto the earth are more quickly than ever unraveling many structures, systems and patterns the world over. But maybe you look around and see that other people you know seem to be doing okay with it all—and in some cases, are actually taking off in their lives. While you are still struggling through old patterns that just don’t seem to let go, despite all your efforts to heal yourself and stay in a high vibration.
First-Wave Lightworkers
I have found there may be several reasons for this phenomenon to be happening to those who are experiencing it. First, many Ascension Lightworkers are people who tend to jump in with both feet into any new direction they know they wish to go in. They know they’re here to assist the Ascension process; and so by golly, they’re going to do it now, and with all they’ve got to give.
Some have referred to this specific group of Lightworkers as “First-Wave” Souls who are here to move toward the “head of the pack”, and to act as pioneers, scouts and leaders during these times. They’re here to go through the Ascension process very quickly in order to be able to assist others coming up behind them.
This makes sense. Not all Lightworkers fit into this category. Some tend to stand back for a while, to see where things are going and witness those ahead of them first before jumping in with what they have to offer.
No one is better or necessarily more “advanced” in any way—it’s just a personality kind of trait. But if you know yourself to be a person who jumps ahead enthusiastically and sometimes fearlessly into new vistas that open up, and you’re being beset by more challenges than other people you know, this may be one of the reasons why.
Starseed Lightworkers
Another reason may be that you originally came from another star system many thousands of years ago, in response to the Earth’s call for help as the Fall of Consciousness was occurring. Many Lightworkers do come from these older, more advanced civilizations.
However, not all Starseeds came to the Earth during that long ago time period (some are here fresh for the first time)—and not all that did come onto the Earth long ago came with the same contract or agreement about what they were coming to do.
Some came agreeing to experience all that could be experienced here on Earth in the Third Dimension, including all the darkest nooks and crannies this dimension had to offer. And that they would do this, first, in order to assist others who were caught in these places—and then to also eventually bring the dark distortions and anomalies they had experienced here back into the Light.
This entailed eventually getting entangled with the most negative energies on and near the earth and thus getting caught on the Wheel of Karma. And this then meant living through lifetime after lifetime, attempting to balance the karma they’d accrued. And, although diligent and conscientious in their working to complete karma in former lifetimes, they have still brought in a bundle this lifetime to finish working through. So this may be true for you too.
Family & Collective Karma
Yet a third reason certain Ascension Lightworkers may be experiencing especially difficult challenges at this time is that many are not only working through their own individual karma. They are also working through collective karma they’ve taken on through their family line—or aspects of karma from the greater collective of humanity.
It is sometimes difficult to distinguish between what is “your” karma or patterns to be worked through and those that may be due to agreements you made to assist humanity along in resolving more collective type issues. But if some of the issues you’re dealing with are those that much of humanity has dealt with for millennia, it’s likely you’re carrying more than your own individual load to work through this time.
No Fair Comparison between Lightworkers
The good news in understanding all this is if you are judging yourself for being so “slow” in working through your stuff in comparison to others around you, you can stop doing so. Or perhaps you’re judging yourself for being so “poor” at manifesting what you want to have happen in your life. You can give yourself some slack and some compassionate understanding for all you’re dealing with.
Even if none of the above reasons apply to you, if you’re having an especially rough time at this point—there really can be no fair comparison between people anyway, even between people who are Ascension Lightworkers. We all have different evolutionary histories, different soul contracts, and different experiences and pathways of awakening we’ve chosen. We’re all where we need to be. And we’re all being readied in the best way possible to serve in the ways we’re here to serve.
So if you run into periods of despair, feeling unempowered and overwhelmed with the changes you’re dealing with, know first of all that you’re being prepared for your role in the best way possible. Hold in there, be patient, and know all is in divine order. At some point, you will be through it.
And secondly, understand that once you are through the worst of it and are fully discovering the power of your newly-awakening 5D Self, you will be able to turn to those who are just beginning to go through all the changes you’ve already been through and be able to really assist them.
Above all, be gentle with yourself. The Ascension process can be very challenging at times. Remember—you are birthing a whole new Self. This takes time and special care.
Note: You can hear this post read here: https://youtu.be/M7QlqlbG1LQ
Thank you for this, Vidya.
I have been dealing with difficult personal and familial struggles since December 2012, and now I am in a void (and have been for approximately one year), during which I have had to face some deep, dark fears – ones that blindsided me, frankly. I now feel that all I needed to let go of has gone and that I have crossed an important threshold in my ascension process. I am emptied out now, which has left me feeling directionless and even passionless, but looking forward to actually being “through it” and inspired again, as I step into my 5D Self…
Lisa
Yes, Lisa–that feeling of being directionless and passionless is another symptom of the Ascension process. It can feel dull and gray and boring–but know that a lot of inner work and final clearing out is still happening. Keep the faith and look for the tiny “sprouts” of new consciousness that are beginning to grow and flourish in the soil you have prepared through your ordeal.–Vidya
Thank you.
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Dear Vidya,
the Ascension process used to be extremely hard, especially between 2002 and 2012. After that, a feeling of calmness and satisfaction has been my daily companion. I reckon the hardest stuff is behind me now. I do have phases of fatigue and intense dreams (I’m in such a phase right now actually), but other than that, it has became much lighter and much more pleasant. I do feel much more cosy within myself; that’s the best way to put it.
Still, my life has been quite uneventful (on the outside at least) and I have been feeling rather passionless and directionless. I have no job (which I actually don’t mind that much) but it would be nice to develop something I can be interested/passionate about. It seems like the only things I enjoy doing are eating, lounging about, reading and watching series and films that interest me 😀
I do wish for some more excitement in my life. I wonder when that will happen.
much love,
kani
I’m in your group Kani. I woke up back then and it was so difficult and very little reflection. Now, I am much calmer and am happy just to take care of myself. We broke the ground for all the rest and now the earth has a safety net it place. Good job to all of us!
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Thank You!
God Bless!
Namaste,
Matt